Building Your Network

By: Brian Tracy

We live in a society, and as a member of that society, it is likely that every change in your life is strongly influenced by other people in some way. The occupation you select, the job you take, and the key steps in your career are largely determined by the people you meet and talk to at those critical decision points in your life.  In fact, at every crossroad in your life there is usually someone standing there pointing you in one direction or another.

The greater number of people you know who can help you at any given time, the more likely it is that you will know the right person at the right time and in the place to give you the help you need to move ahead more rapidly in your life.  The more people you know, the more doors of opportunity will be open to you and the more sound advice you will get in making the important decisions that shape your life.  These people are your “reference group.”

When you develop a positive reference group, you begin to become a member of the in-crowd at your level of business.  The starting point in this process is to develop a deliberate and systematic approach to networking throughout your career.

People like to do business with people they know.  They like to socialize and interact with people with whom they are familiar.  And they like to recommend people they trust.  Fully 85% of the best jobs in America are filled as the result of a third party recommendation.  The best networkers are never unemployed for very long.

One of the biggest mistakes that people make when they begin networking is scattering their time and energy indiscriminately and spending their time with people who can be of no help at all.  Even if they attend organization meetings, they often end up associating with people who are neither particularly ambitious nor well connected.

When you network, you must be perfectly selfish.  You want to become all you can over the course of your career.  You want to rise as far as you can. Any success you could ever desire will require the active involvement and help of lots of other people. Your job is to focus your energies and attention on meeting the people who can help you and the only way you can do this is by staying away from the people who cannot help you at all.

You begin your networking process at your place of work.  Look around and identify the top people in your organization.  Make these people your role models and pattern yourself after them.  One of the best ways to start networking is to go to someone you admire and ask for his or her advice.  Don’t be a pest.  Don’t tie up several hours of their time.  Initially you should ask for only a few minutes and you should have two or three specific questions.  When you talk to a successful person, ask questions like, “What do you think is the most important quality or attribute that has contributed to your success?” and, “What one piece of advice would you give to someone like me who wants to be as successful as you some day?” 

People become committed to helping you, or associating with you, little by little over time.  In some cases the chemistry won’t be right and the person with whom you would like to network will really not be interested in networking with you.  Don’t take this personally.  People get into, or out of, networking for a thousand reasons.  However, if there is good chemistry, be patient and bide your time.  Don’t rush or hurry, just let the networking relationship unfold without over-eagerness on your part.  If you try to go too fast, you will scare people away.

 Instead of asking your superiors for more money, ask for more responsibility.  Tell your boss that you are determined to be extremely valuable to the organization and that you are willing to work extra hours in order to make a more important contribution.

There is nothing so impressive to a boss as an employee who continually volunteers for more responsibility.  Many people have the unfortunate goal of doing as little as possible for as much money as possible. But not the winners.  The winners realize that if all you do is what you’re being paid for today, you can never be paid any more in the future. The person who continually volunteers for extra assignments and does more than is expected gains the respect, esteem and support of his or her boss.

We have moved from the age of the go-getter to the age of the go-giver.  A go-giver is a person who practices the law of sowing and reaping.  He or she is always looking for opportunities to sow, knowing that reaping is not the result of chance.   You will find that successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others.  Unsuccessful people are always asking, “What’s in it for me?”

The surprising thing is that the more of yourself you give away with no direct expectation of return, the more good things come back to you in the most unexpected ways.  In fact, it seems that the help we get in life almost invariably comes from people whom we have not helped directly.  Rather, it comes from others who have been influenced by people whom we have helped directly.  Therefore, since you can’t control where your help or assistance is coming from, you must establish a blanket policy of giving with complete confidence that it will come back to you in the most wonderful ways.

Whatever your job or occupation, there are trade and industry associations, business associations and service clubs that you can join.  Excellent networkers are among the best known and most respected people in the community.  To reach that status, they followed a simple formula.  They carefully identified the clubs and associations whose members they can help and support and who can help and support them in return.  And then they joined and participated.

When you look at the various organizations you should join, you should select no more than two or three.  Target the ones with the people that can be the most helpful to you.  When you join, your strategy should be to look at the various committees of the organization.  Volunteer for the committee that engages in the activities that are most important to the organization, such as governmental affairs or fundraising.  Then get fully involved in your chosen responsibilities.

You will find that the members of the key committees are usually key players in the business community as well.  By joining the committee, you create an opportunity to interact with them in a completely voluntary and non-threatening way.  You give them a chance to see what you can really do, outside the work environment.  And you contribute to the committee as a peer, not as an employee or subordinate.

Networking fulfills one of your deepest subconscious needs — getting to know people and being known by them.  It fulfills your need for social interaction and for the establishing of friendly relationships.  It broadens your perspective and opens doors of opportunities for you.  It increases the number of people who know and respect you. It makes you feel more in control of your career.  And it can be one of the most exciting and fulfilling experiences of your life.

About the Author

Brian Tracy is a legendary in the fields of management, leadership, and sales.  He has produced more than 300 audio/video programs and has written 28 books, including his just-released book “The Psychology of Selling.” Special offer: To receive your free copy of “Crunch Time!, just visit and click on the Crunch Time! icon.  He can be reached at (858) 481-2977 or

Leave a comment